An interview: Getting Up Close and Personal with my friend 'Monday'
Me: Hey there Good Morning
Monday (Stumbling out of deep
slumber): What? What? Is it my turn already?
Me: Hey No, chill, it's just
Monday (Falling back on his
bed and sounding very annoyed): What are you doing then, waking me up? Can't a
man have some peace even on off days.
Me: Oops sorry there. It's
just that I had to turn in a piece on you and I thought I'd get an interview.
Monday: An interview?? Like
I'm a celeb or what?
Me: Um.. actually I googled
you and all I found were loads of caricatures saying nasty things about you. I
thought I'd get your perspective on this whole Monday Blues, Manic Monday
Monday (Snorting): Oh I
know your journo type. You'll pretend to be all nice and fair and I-
want-your-side-of-the-story, all Simi Garewalish. Then you'll just go out and
turn into an Arnab Goswami and write a sarcy, nasty piece. You know how
people interview Mallika Sherawat then make fun of her accent, or get a starlet
to deny an affair and then put the ‘just friends’ in quotes like this. So no
Thank You. I’m good.
Me: You’ve got it all wrong. Trust
me. I’m a friend. For the record I’m not a Monday hater. Never have been. We work in shifts.. My off days have varied from Wednesdays to Saturdays so
my Mondays haven’t been Mondays at all, at least not the much maligned Mondays.
I’m the most neutral person you’re ever likely to get to tell your story to.
Monday (Disappearing back
under the sheets): Story? I have no story to tell. Nighty night.
Me: Come on Monday. Don’t get
Monday (Emerging from the
covers): Gosh but you’re persistent. Oh alright since I’m awake anyway, fire
Me (trying to look all
friendly and grateful): Thanks thanks Mon.. may I call you Mon?
Monday (Still grumpy):
Whatever! Get on with it, will you.
Me: So Mon you seem to be the
most universally hated day of the week. How do you feel?
Mon (Smirking): You sure are
original! Really the journo type – the type who thrusts a mike in the face of a
man stuck in a manhole and asks him, “So Sir how do you feel?” How do I
feel???? For godsake how would you feel? How would anyone feel? Being maligned
for no reason at all. Had it not been for me would anything get done anywhere in the world barring a few countries? Is it my fault that people refuse to give up their bingeing and partying
even after two whole days and nights and are then hung over all of me? Is it my fault that the funnest days come right before me? How would you feel when Saturday and Sunday strut about right
behind you with their “We’re the most popular days” faces? And you know the
irony? No one would even look at them had it not been for me. So much for their
lording it over the rest of us! But do I tell them that? No I don’t. Like I
said I’m a peaceful guy. I do my day’s worth and then snuggle up and sleep
unless I’m invaded by you journo types.
what’s this 'journo type' you keep going on about? I’m on your side, remember? So you think
people have been unfair to you?
Mon: Of course they’ve been
unfair. But then life, my friend is
unfair. Being in a place like me turns a guy philosophical. God made us all the
same. It’s you who turned us into super Sundays and monster Mondays. Did I tell you to work like Zombies without stopping to enjoy yourself? Is
it my fault you get yourselves caught in jobs you hate?
Me: So what advice would you like
to give our readers?
Mon: I’m not one for advising
anyone. All I’ll say is STOP THE HATE. Give yourself a break if you want to.. even
if it’s a Monday. Then get back to work. In fact, how about reserving one happy thing for a Monday? Make it a mazedaar Monday.. will you? Love your job and you’ll find you love
me too. Love me and see how your life changes.
And now may I just go back to bed?
That dear readers was 'Monday' for you. I've been forbidden from putting any caricatures that perpetuate the myth that Mondays are anything but mazedaar so this post goes pictureless.
Labels: blog-a-prompt, just for fun, marathon bloggers, mock interview, Monday, random