Once I was obsessivemom. I outgrew it.
I think I did. I sure hope I did. The thing is you never know.
I do however, remain, a 'mom' observer. They're interesting, believe me. Being a mom changes you in a way you would never have imagined. It makes you a new, different person, sometimes unrecognisable by your old self. A lot of these moms below live inside me.
1. 'My child best' mom: She's easy to spot. She wears her child like a medal. Nope, God didn't make any other child as wonderful as hers. No one can dance like her, sing like her, write or speak or jump or run or even walk as gracefully, as athletically as hers.
2. Know it all mom: Yeah she knows it all. A stomach ache? She has the cure. A dance class? She knows the best one. Fancy dress, super recipes, parenting styles - she knows all. Have a suggestion? Well keep your mouth shut!
3. 'Go get it' mom: She's the ultimate motivator. She'll push and she'll prod and she'll push some more till she has her child on that victory stand. She won't pause, she won't stop. Not even to check if her child wants to be there at all.
4. The co-curricular mom: She's the one you're most likely to bump into in elevators. A Hi! and Bye! and she's gone, kids in tow - one class to the next. Her kids need to learn everything. From chess to ballet, piano to Spanish, basketball to the drum, she has it all covered.
5. Food fanatic mom: She's the gajar ka halwa, the garam garam roti mom - the one who spends hours whipping up the perfect recipe. She revels in the fact that she makes her own ketchups and jams, that her pizza is better than Dominoes and her burger better than Mc Donalds.
6. The psychology professor mom: She's Ms Analysis. Every action of hers and her child's is examined and cross examined, analysed and cross analysed. "I yelled at him. Will it scar him for life?" "He scored badly in his tests, will he go into a depression?"
7. Academic mom: She's the one who lives one unit test to the next. Exam times see her at her peak. She will obsesses about each quarter mark lost and will keep track of her child's ranking like Shylock counted his gold.
8. Cleanliness freak mom: That can of sanitiser will give her away. Open her bag and you'll find dry tissues, wet tissues, tissue rolls, soap strips and napkins. She covers her mouth when she steps on the road. She sanitises her kids' hands every five minutes and wipes glasses and plates in restaurants before food is served.
9. 'I'm your friend' mom: This ones not quite a mom at all. She's a friend, a pal. She dresses like her daughter and shares her makeup. She uses slang like her kids and hangs out with their friends on FB.
10. The 'Awww' mom: She's the one who cannot get over how wonderful her kids are. She tears up at every smiley her child gets at school and cries over every 'I love you note' from her child. She can't talk without a 'sweety' or a 'honey' and is always found hugging, petting and cuddling her 'baby'.
11. 'My kids are my life' mom: Her life begins and ends with her kids. Her conversation never strays from them. Suggest a coffee date and she'll fix you with an incredulous stare, "What? Without the kids?".. and you'll slink away feeling a mean and selfish mom. As for me time... what's that? she asks.
12. The perfect mom: She's the toughest to define. Um.. actually she's the easiest to define for aren't all moms just perfect?
Oh they can be annoying, intriguing and so so different, but they don't deserve to be judged. They all, yes all, love their children and are trying really hard to do the best they can.
This post was done for Write Tribe. For more '12 most...' entries go here.
Labels: humour I hope, Parenting, Write Tribe